Results From Our Exhaustive, Ground-Breaking and Very Expensive Marriage Survey

We asked more than 1,100 people across the country to tell us about their marriages–what’s working, what’s not. Below, a sample. If you want to dig deeper, download an excel spreadsheet with the raw data.


40% of men say they do more than half the housework
71% sometimes feel like like "it's a losing battle" when they fight with their spouses
53% keep arguing even after they start repeating themselves
34% keep fighting after they can't remember what they were originally fighting about
34% keep fighting after they know they're wrong
51% talk to their friends about their own sex lives
58% talk to their friends about their friends' sex lives
60% read articles and books about improving their sex lives
53% watch TV shows discussing other people's sex lives
78% had sex daily or at least two to three times a week when they were first married
28% currently have sex daily or at least two to three times a week
54% wish they were having more sex
92% of people who have sex two to three times a week report being satisfied or very satisfied in their relationships
56% of people who have sex every few months report being satisfied or very satisfied in their relationships
#1 reason people don't have sex: "Too tired"
#2 reason people don't have sex: "Not in the mood"
#3 reason people don't have sex: "Angry"
47% sometimes have sex even when they're not in the mood
11% frequently have sex even when they're not in the mood
83% have sex when they're not in the mood "to make their partners happy"
75% have sex when they're not in the mood because they "expect to enjoy it anyway"
62% have sex when they're not in the mood so they don't hurt their spouse's feelings
48% have sex when they're not in the mood "to earn good will"
45% have sex when they're not in the mood because their spouse "deserves it"
36% have sex when they're not in the mood because they "feel guilty"
77% agree with the statement, "The amount of sex diminishes over time"
76% disagreed with the statement, "The amount of sex should diminish over time"
56% have put on weight since they got married
46% are less affectionate than they once were
49% use incentives to get their spouses to do things
49% use praise to get what they want
48% offer to do "something in exchange" to get what they want
25% ask over and over again to get what they want
15% point out that their friends' spouses are better
42% regret being too honest with their spouses
35% regret not being honest with their spouses
42% have withheld important information from their spouses
67% withhold information from their spouses because they don't want to "get into a lengthy discussion"
84% are confident their spouses will never cheat on them
The hardest part about being married: 'Learning to live with another person in the house'
The hardest part about being married: 'Different points of view'
The hardest part about being married: 'Making myself less of a priority'
The hardest part about being married: 'Not always getting my way'
The hardest part about being married: 'Agreeing to disagree'
The hardest part about being married: 'Negotiating different goals'
The hardest part about being married: 'I can't do everything I want when I want to'
The hardest part about being married: 'Toilet seat'