But when do I ever do that? Not long ago, I wrote a blog post for The Wall Street Journal called, “The Secret to a Happy Marriage: Do the Dishes, Put Out, Don’t Talk So Much.” I recommended 5 tips for marital bliss, including the three in the title, and also lose weight and “scheme.”
The comments from readers came rushing in. Some people hated me. “This article is truly disgusting… I am re-setting my home page to the NYT in protest.”
Others thought I had a knack for stating the obvious: “I do the dishes. I shut up when shutting up is appropriate. I take care of my body. I put out. That’s what makes a good spouse of any gender. That’s what my mom and dad, married for 48 years, do as well.”
I stand by those tips, but I will say this: It’s one thing to dish out advice, and it’s another thing to take it. I’m thinking about tip #2: Lose weight. This one’s been especially hard for me since having a baby. Not that I need to lose weight–but I do need to exercise more. I find a ton of excuses for not being able to make it to the gym or the yoga studio. And I’m constantly coming up with new schemes, like joining the gym at work and running on the treadmill from 2:30 to 3 pm daily, or blowing a ton of cash on a 3-day-a-week boot camp run by former Navy SEALS, or running to the subway and then taking the subway to work, or doing the 30-Day Shred DVD, or Tracy Anderson’s insane ab routine. Here’s me taking a Kettle Bells class that I thought would get me motivated–but that lasted exactly one class.
I just can’t stick to anything. There’s always something else I’d rather be doing, like hanging out with my kid, or channel surfing, or cooking, or drinking copious amounts of alcohol. This morning I had plenty of time to get some exercise in. But what did I do? Sat on my ass blogging.
Can anyone help me? Please?